This Post Is All About You: What Do YOU Want to Discuss?

This Post Is All About You: What Do YOU Want to Discuss? | Catherine Summers AKA Not Dressed As Lamb, Over 40 Fashion and Lifestyle Blog (random retro collage featuring men and women, old-style electronics and planets)

I’m just a girl, standing in front of her audience, asking them to TALK to her.

Yeah, I squandered that cheesy quote in my last post about my crazy bright raincoat. But it felt right to squander it a little more because it’s EXACTLY what I’m doing here.

Okay, okay, I’m not literally standing – I’m sitting typing… and I’m fully aware you’re not literally in front of me – you’re at home or at work or on the train home or reading your phone under the bedsheets… but I AM – I really am – asking you to talk to me.

Well okay I don’t want a barrage of phone calls – I detest talking on the phone in general – you know I mean talk to me here, on the blog, in the comments? Don’t you?


[Reading time: < 2 mins]


What I want from you

Here’s where I get demanding. I want YOU to tell ME what YOU want to talk about. The comments section is often my favourite part of the blog, and when we have a juicy topic to discuss (like Instagram filters, the ageing process or defunct clothes shops from our youth) it seems that you lot rather like it too, joining in with tales of your wild experiences, brilliant anecdotes or considered opinions. I love the conversations we have.

But is there anything you’re desperate to talk about that I’ve not already covered? Anything you’ve ever thought That would be a great topic to discuss on someone’s blog?

I want this post to be a chance where those who often join in comments tell me what they’re dying to discuss. And it’s ALSO a chance for those of you that silently read to maybe, just once, tell me what you’re interested in. I’m not berating anyone for not commenting – far from it! I LOVE that anyone has visited and read something here, with or without comments. I’m just encouraging you to speak up if you never have but always wanted to.

So whether you’d like to see something about menopause (I just started my HRT journey this week so I’ll definitely be discussing that in time), or other health concerns, or a particular fashion trend, or something you read online or in the media about older women that makes you happy, or sad, or proud (I’m just making this up, it could be anything) – I’d like you to tell me.

Think of it this way: what would you like to see discussed in a comments section that you simply CANNOT help but join in with? Something serious? Something frustrating? Something frivolous and funny? I’d like to think I cover topics that address issues evoking all those sort of feelings, but if I’m not: this is your chance to tell me.

I’m looking forward to finding out what burning issues you want to discuss…

All that’s left to say is, Happy Sunday – and comment away below!


Stay safe XOXO

Catherine signature


Linking up to… Monday: Stylish Monday (second Monday of the month), Inspire Me MondayMy Glittery Heart, On Mondays We Link Up || Tuesday: Style With a Smile, Trend Spin/Walking in Memphis in High Heels, Turning Heads Tuesday, Spread the Kindness, Confident Twosday, Happy Now Blog Link Up || Wednesday: WowOnWednesday || Thursday: Chic & Stylish, Ageless Style Linkup (third Thursday of the month), || Friday: Neverending Style, Fancy Friday, On the Edge, Fabulous Friday’s Link Up

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  1. Naomi
    27 February 2022 / 5:41 pm

    Hi Catherine,

    I know you have put a lot of thought into diversity and have been rigorous in selecting which brands you work with – I admire this. Do you have an opinion on diversity in representations of men’s fashion, and whether it tends to be better or worse than for women? Do you have any interest in menโ€™s fashion blogging? I enjoyed Keithโ€™s Silver Londoner blog when it was active.


  2. Yojji
    25 February 2022 / 12:31 am

    A few years ago, I decided to make my favorite outfit my uniform to cut down on decision-making stress. I wore a black, v-neck t-shirt, jeans, Chelsea boots, and a black trench coat every day. I saved my good clothes for the few and rare special occasions that warranted a special effort. No one noticed (or cared) that I wore the same thing day-after-day.

    I’ve just turned 51 and find myself obscurely guilty about getting older. I’m not particularly feeling particularly graceful about aging. (although, it’s better than the alternative.) Everyone I know complains about getting old and fat. I find it all boring and depressing. Last year, I started working out (for my health) and began looking better…but what’s the point of getting all cute when no one can tell? I’m a former high-end vintage dealer and I’m good at scoring clothes on a budget. Since I no longer shop to pay my bills, I’ve gone on a clothes buying binge that would be the envy of my broke-ass younger self.

    The problem is…I don’t have anywhere to wear all my new duds. I now work from home – I could wear pajamas all day. My new boyfriend is a cranky old man who wants to stay in and listen to old records every night. My best girlfriend lives far away. Covid relegated my fantasy social life to some time in the future – but that future is nigh.

    I feel like I wasn’t made for these times. (yeah…me, Brian Wilson, and every other romantic who has ever lived.)

    I guess I could get dressed up, take selfies, and post them on the internet. I was watching this thing the other day about virtual clothing for people on social media. There’s NO way in HELL I would spend real money on fake clothes.

    They say it gets harder to make friends as you get older. I’m all dressed up with no place to go and I’d love some fun ideas.


    * Uniforms
    * Feeling guilty about getting older
    * Having better things to think about than aging
    * Making improvements
    * Scoring clothes on a budget
    * Creating occasions
    * Old records – dancing in your living room
    * Virtual clothing
    * Making connections

    I could keep going?

  3. 20 February 2022 / 12:46 am

    How to feel sexy and/or pretty with the aforementioned jowls, weight gain, age spots, etc. changing our appearance? How does one think positively about this?

    I love the invisibility I have gained as I have aged. It’s great not being harassed and bothered. I imagine it’s really hard for some women, though, so how to deal with that?

    What are your favorite bits of wisdom that aging has imparted?

    Many thanks for a smashing blog, as always!

    • Reggie
      23 February 2022 / 8:20 pm

      I would love this. I’m 35, and by traditional society standards “peaking” at the moment. My face is starting to change shape a little; the weight I put on from the pandemic sits differently on my face. I can just tell it hangs a little lower. I don’t think other people noticed, but I can when I look in the mirror and I’m trying to not give myself a complex.

      I can also feel my societal value shift or even decline slightly. My social power is finally shifting away from my appearance to my capabilities and achievements, which is awesome. It feels amazing to begin to be recognized for something I’ve done. But I still have that weird toxic “wait, am I not pretty anymore?” feeling. Very much a situation where I’ve been catcalled a good chunk of my life, and its died down somewhat. But I know men haven’t stopped catcalling in general, so something about me is no longer appealing. I hate I feel this way.

      Essentially I want to know how y’all dealt with this, and what you wish you’d done earlier/differently. I’m really looking forward to being an eccentric old lady but there seem to be some bumps along the road.

      • Catherine
        24 February 2022 / 4:42 pm

        Thank you Reggie for your insight on this! As mentioned to Annie it’s not something I ever really experienced… funnily enough I felt the opposite as I got older. It’d be interesting to know where you’re from with regards to the catcalling: in the UK it’s now a policy of just about all building sites to not allow workers to catcall (I don’t actually know for sure but I’m certain I read somewhere that it’s grounds for dismissal or at least disciplinary action). Also very recently the Law Commission is considering the criminalisation of catcalling as it’s misogynistic. As much as I dress more colourfully than the average woman, being catcalled is something I have never, ever been flattered by. ANYWAY this is what I should be discussing in the post! Thank you for your input ๐Ÿ˜€

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:35 pm

      Thanks so much for the suggestion Annie – I might have to do a bit of questioning [others] as weirdly I’ve never felt “invisible”… maybe because I never felt particularly visible before? It’ll be a good question to ponder!

      Now on the list ๐Ÿ˜€

  4. 17 February 2022 / 12:41 pm

    Aha….after just chatting to you, I’ve come up with something….blogging, and how it’s changed since you first started. I think that would be really interesting ๐Ÿ™‚
    Suzy xx

    • Frieda
      17 February 2022 / 5:24 pm

      Yes to that! As I’m only reading blogs, not having one myself, I find any insights into bloggins, social media, ect. very interesting.

      • Catherine
        24 February 2022 / 4:46 pm

        Ahh that’s interesting that you find it interesting Frieda ( ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) – I do worry that posts about blogging is not of any interest to those that don’t [do it]. I’m sure you’ll be interested to read what I find interesting about how it’s changed and in who’s interest it’s changed, LOL (ENOUGH WITH THE INTERESTS!!!!)

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:43 pm

      Oh gosh it has changed COMPLETELY since I first started, Suzy! Great suggestion, thank you! x

  5. Michelle Springer
    16 February 2022 / 10:05 pm

    As another person who joins the 50 club this year, I wouldn’t mind posts about how our generation is doing things a little differently than the previous generation- how we are taking those old stereotypes and burning them to the ground. ๐Ÿ˜‰
    I also would love to see more posts about all the fun (NOT!) that comes with perimenopause/menopause (I swear my newly discovered chin hair is coming in gray!).

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:49 pm

      Michelle that IS a good idea for a post, the Generation Xers like you and me vs the Baby Boomers… first thing that comes to mind is fashion “rules”. I’d like to think that no one takes any notice of them anymore, but you’d be surprised how many women still do…!

      And yes to (peri)menopause as a big subject in a blog post. Once I’ve got a few months of HRT under my belt (quite literally as the patches have to go below your waist!!) I’ll have more to talk about. So definitely towards to the end of the year for that subject – thank you my lovely! #TwoThumbsUp x

      • 23 June 2022 / 11:37 am

        ‘first thing that comes to mind is fashion โ€œrulesโ€. Iโ€™d like to think that no one takes any notice of them anymore, but youโ€™d be surprised how many women still doโ€ฆ!’

        OMG, I’m only coming up 47 and I’m feeling and looking 20 years older! I want to be stylish but with bloating and horrendous weight gain nothing fits or looks good and I’m resorting to shopping for comfy fit granny clothes. I’m permanently knackered and can’t be bothered to have a hair cut. And the chin hairs! Where the hell did they come from?! Christ knows what my kids are going to think of me when they get to teenage years if I can’t sort myself out by then.

  6. Sarah
    14 February 2022 / 10:26 pm

    I’ve loved your blog for years, Catherine. Thanks for giving me many a laugh and many a lift to the spirits in that time, not to mention some great ideas for outfits!

    I’ve been freelancing for ages and am about to start working in-house again. I’d love a post on How to Dress for the Office (Without Looking like a Head Girl). My work is creative, so I’m happily able to include colour and pattern, but I’ll also need to look a bit more polished than I have while working from home. I feel sure you could show me the way.


    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:51 pm

      Well would you believe it Sarah – I already have that post underway and half-written, lots of outfit ideas already prepped! I’m looking to publish it right at the beginning of March (currently pencilled in for the 1st, though quite often planned dates shift on a little), but it’s a definite. Thank you so much for suggesting it! x

  7. Lynn
    14 February 2022 / 4:50 pm

    I would like to see us talk about and find ways to deal with the idea that older is equated with less desirable, less informed, and out of step with current fashion, technology, and trends.

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:54 pm

      Thank you Lynn! That’s a great idea – I’m wondering whether it can be tied in with another commenter’s suggestion of a post about becoming invisible… they definitely feel like they’re along the same lines xx

  8. Judy
    14 February 2022 / 11:59 am

    I am well past the HRT discussion, but it is hugely important to women to take charge of their health by being fully informed and insisting on the best care for themselves, so yes please to that convo for your readers(I wish I had someone to encourage me to be more bold years ago). One of the biggest struggles for me as an adult woman over 60 is how to make new friends, as we are approaching the time of ours passing or moving to be near family. Covid restrictions are making this even harder, and add in a rather introverted nature, and it is daunting. I quite enjoy your exuberant flair in clothing choices, and your forthright manner in dealing with whatever matter at hand. Plus, let’s be honest, the dog pics are always a hit. From a reader in the US and her dog.

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 4:57 pm

      Aww thank you Judy for your kind words! Being in control of your own health is a VERY important topic and a subject I am personally very concerned about. It’s interesting that you say you wish someone has encouraged you to be bolder when you were young… I think that’s another thing to explore. How to teach the next generation to learn from our mistakes, and how to encourage them and set a good example. LOTS of things to think about – I really appreciate your input! xx

  9. 14 February 2022 / 1:06 am

    This is possibly being too cheeky. But. Occasionally, back in the past, you’ve mentioned explaining your weight routine at some point, and how to do it for oneself. I would love this. What exercise you do, number of reps etc, how often.

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 5:02 pm

      Ahhh I did wonder if anyone would bring this up, Ratnamurti… as you probably saw, I wrote near the end of last year about my mental health being inextricably liked to my physical health. Well my physical health is right back to its lowest point (probably lower than it’s ever been), so at the moment there’s NO way I feel I have any right to talk about a routine that I don’t even do anymore (because I’m simply unable to). I’m the unfittest I’ve ever been, and I didn’t write that post when I DID get fit 18 months ago because my physical health slipped away from me very, very quickly. So in theory yes, it would be a great post to write, but until I’ve got that fitness back I couldn’t write about it with any great conviction I’m afraid ๐Ÿ™ xx

  10. Sue Dunlop
    13 February 2022 / 6:40 pm

    Thanks for throwing this out Catherine – there already already some great topics! Iโ€™m wondering about how much we are conditioned to believe that if the clothes we love donโ€™t look the same on us as they do the models, that we are somehow lacking or simply โ€œtooโ€. How do we interrogate that?

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 5:04 pm

      Hmm that’s a very insightful thought, Sue… if you think about it it doesn’t make sense that clothing brands don’t make them look good on us regular women? But then also, more and more brands are using women of all shapes and sizes so maybe a shift is happening… I’ll ponder that one for sure and write a post if I can flesh it out with more thoughts, thank you so much for the suggestion! x

  11. Lynn Jones
    13 February 2022 / 5:55 pm

    Wow, what a question. ( Puts on thinking head ) ๐Ÿ™‚

    Any of the following, or none if others haven questions that chime more deeply with you…

    If you could change three things about the fashion and beauty industry, what would they be and why?

    What do you think could be done to bring more equality to the workplace around pay, working hours, connections, etc to helping women?

    If clothing is part of image we project to the world, what do our choices say about us, and wear do those choices mean, if anything, to anyone?

    We seem to be seeing more diversity and openness about gender and sexuality in the generations younger than us. How do you think that might change style and what advice might you give someone younger?

    What do you wish readers, promoters, and the general public understood about blogging?

    PS: Love the blog and your style of writing. I, umm, don’t always comment, but try to. I guess it’s about not wanting to add a ‘oh, that’s nice’ reply, as that doesn’t seem to add anything or give you anywhere to go with a reply.

    • Lynn Jones
      13 February 2022 / 5:56 pm

      Oops. Not “…and wear do those choices mean…”, but what do those choices mean.

    • Sue Dunlop
      13 February 2022 / 6:41 pm

      Love all of these. The end

      • Catherine
        14 February 2022 / 8:01 pm

        I agree, Sue!

        • Lynn Jones
          14 February 2022 / 9:48 pm

          Thank you. I think it’ll be an interesting to see what other readers ask and to see what comes out of those too.

    • Catherine
      24 February 2022 / 5:07 pm

      WOW Lynn, what a fantastic list of topics to consider! Thank you so much (and no worries about the commenting, you’ve more than made up for it here, lol! ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) – I will make a note of these, I’m sure inspiration will hit with more than one of your ideas in the near future!

  12. Kelly Novak Montano
    13 February 2022 / 5:21 pm

    I’d like to see the what you think and others about long vs. short hair, greying and letting it go so to speak, grrrr, how we become invisible as women when we reach a certain age (another grrrrr) I’ve felt or am doing all these and not bothered most the time…..but

    • Catherine
      14 February 2022 / 8:01 pm

      Kelly that IS a good suggestion, thank you – as a long-haired nearly-50-year-old I think it’s something I SHOULD talk about, all those preconceptions and “rules” that so many women still think exist. Maybe the short hair thing IS to make us more invisible?

      Post title: “Why are women ‘expected’ to have short hair as they age? And do modern older women still think they should be cutting their hair?”

      (or something along those lines!) x

      • 17 February 2022 / 7:33 pm

        Well, but then we have to be careful of not assuming here. Short, long, gray or not gray…it’s all the same, isn’t it? A personal choice.

        Lots of young women have very short hair, buzzed heads even. Short hair is not just on older ladies. I’ve been so pleased of late to see young ladies on television ads here in France with short, even buzzed haircuts. How refreshing from the sale ole’ same ole’ long hair. I’m 57 and have had very short hair for 24 years, that I have let go naturally gray. I happen to think there’s nothing edgier and younger looking than a bold, short, gray haircut.

        • Catherine
          24 February 2022 / 5:13 pm

          I think you may have misunderstood what I’m saying here, Paperesse… I’m not agreeing with the concept that older ladies “should” cut their hair, it’s the fact that this age-old misconception/fashion rule that dictates that this is what we should be doing exists AT ALL. So in a way you’ve written a micro blog post in response to that notion, you’ve summed up the sort of thing that I’d actually say! I needed ideas for blog posts, I’m not actually discussing the topics here – hence the proposed blog title I mentioned to Kelly…!

          • 27 February 2022 / 6:23 pm

            Okie dokie, I’ll look forward to reading it if/when you do! And yep, let’s throw all those ‘ought to’ ageisms right out the door, whatever they are!!!

  13. Leah
    13 February 2022 / 5:06 pm

    I just discovered your blog, what a delight! So many guides say to pick your fashion style and build around it – how do you do that if you love anything?? Boho – check. Sophisticated – absolutely! Modern – yes please. Edgy – yup that too. I don’t know how to pull those bits of me together into one fabulous look. I will turn 50 in November and love my age!! No thank you to the angst, rage, fear, and ceaseless questioning of self in my 20s and 30s. I would love to hear all of your experiences of aging including HRT. My late 40s have felt like a roulette wheel of aging changes, umm hello jowls, what are you doing here?! Crepey eyelids, why, haven’t I been kind to you. Facial hairs, I’m a LADY!! Anyways, I look forward to reading whatever you post, you are an absolute delight!

    • Catherine
      14 February 2022 / 7:57 pm

      Leah welcome, fellow ’72 baby! So glad you’re enjoying the blog, I hope I continue to live up to your expectations ๐Ÿ™‚

  14. 13 February 2022 / 2:17 pm

    Apologies if you’ve covered this before, but what are we thinking about And Just Like That? Is it too downbeat, too sneery about 50 plus year old women’s concerns, or does it strike the right tone? I’m in two minds – I love the clothes, the settings, the look and feel, and I can relate, but sometimes it’s so cringemaking I have to use the mute button! One thing I am sure about is that it’s soooo good to see women in their fifties on TV in leading roles. Perhaps British telly might take that up sometime? Loooove the blog, btw!

    • Catherine
      14 February 2022 / 1:42 pm

      Dez this is a BRILLIANT suggestion – thank you! I’ve watched the whole series – much to my own annoyance – and yes I think there’s a LOT in it to talk about. In fact, if I don’t have an outfit post ready for tomorrow (Tuesday 15th) I’m going to do the post then instead. I’d already renamed the show And Just Like That, We Cringed…!! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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