Pared back, barefaced, dressed down… I wanted to do something a little different for today’s #iwillwearwhatilike outfit post after the shenanigans on social media this weekend.
You may have seen Friday’s post where I talked about how women are still tearing each other down online after I had the joy of a sad little troll (or two, or three) on Friday. I followed it up with a mini blog on Instagram yesterday after receiving an email earlier in the morning about the whole affair, which, I should add, was NOT in agreement with my sentiments about how women should stop treating each other.
I’ll let you catch up on those posts without going into it further here (or dwelling, which I definitely don’t do!) – suffice to say, it prompted me to go barefaced and dressed down today.
Or rather: I thought I’d show you what I look like 80-90% of the time. Me, and how I roughly look most days (rough quite often being the operative word). Why?
Because #iwillwearwhatilike, and I will post what I like on my blog too.
Because seeing as so many of my slightly more “unusual” outfits (and by that I mean wide leg trousers or dungarees, both of which unbelievably were the subject of vitriol last week, and yes I know what you’re thinking… Those two items are hardly the stuff of sartorial nightmares, are they?) seem to bring out the hatred and negativity in some people, I thought I’d tempt them with a mundane, everyday outfit with a slice of “up yours” thrown in for good measure.
Self-confidence is the best outfit
I present you with my “Self-confidence is the best outfit” slogan t-shirt, a gift sent to me from the lovely (and very-opposite-of-a-troll) Ann of Kremb de la Kremb a couple of years ago (I helped Ann out, she sent me a gift and a handwritten card. How lovely is that?). The message on this t-shirt couldn’t be any louder or clearer: It really doesn’t matter WHAT you’re wearing, if you’re wearing it with confidence then it’s the best outfit ever.
And that’s something that NO ONE can argue with.
(Or they can try, and then they’ll be sorry they did if they argue with me over it #IWillShoutForTheVulnerableOnes)
So I’m pretty much makeup-free (I’m wearing coloured lip balm and a splodge of cream blush to avoid the vampire look).
I’ve got my “comfies” on to walk the dog.
I didn’t “do” my hair.
My nail varnish is chipped (and completely removed from one of my thumbnails).
There’s a stain down one of my trouser legs.
I didn’t “check my outfit” before we took pictures for t-shirts riding up or anything similar.
I’m still wearing my FitBit which I normally take off for outfit photos.
And Riley is in nearly every shot because he wouldn’t move out the way.
In other words – what you see is what you get. Take it or leave it. It’s a boring outfit, but this is the kind of thing I wear most days because I’m either working on the blog at home, walking the dog or running errands. On the days I dress up a little more we take pictures. But the t-shirt – and its message – is the real star here.
Here’s the point: My outfits are not up for discussion. I don’t need to know whether my readers like it, and I definitely do NOT need to know if they don’t like it. And nor does anyone else, because that sort of discussion is puerile and unproductive. I can guarantee you most women, even the most experienced fashion bloggers, will not appreciate having their picture put up on an external platform somewhere (without their permission) accompanied by invitations to critique what she is wearing, with the added “I think it’s a No” thrown in (which is one of the things that happened to me on Friday).
I asked a few friends what they’d think if I did that to them:
“I’d care because it’s a shitty thing to do, not because people didn’t like my outfit.”
And another:
“I’d be very hurt. Not because you didn’t like the outfit but because you were inviting criticism.”
And lastly:
“It’s unkind. It’s stirring and generally being bitchy and nasty with a desire to bring other women down.”
So when I’m told I should give it a rest because it’s “healthy debate”, it makes my blood boil because it’s anything but healthy. I don’t have time for women who want to busy themselves with what other women are wearing in a vocally critical way, and bring them down in the process.
I want to know what wonderful women think.
Because I wear whatever I like and have the self-confidence to do so, I want to hear that at least one of my readers has been a little inspired to do the same. Maybe she wants to recreate my outfit or take inspiration from it – if so, that’s fantastic. But if she merely thinks, I’m going to wear my dungarees/mini skirt/leather trousers/sleeveless top/leopard coat because this blogger says I can and should, then THAT’S all that matters.
So to all the women that take part in the criticising-other-women platforms and think it’s okay, think again. Our voice (and, quite often, dress sense) is far louder than yours will ever be…!
I’D LOVE IT IF EVERYONE READING THIS WORE ONE THING THAT THEY KEEP WISHING THEY HAD THE CONFIDENCE TO WEAR (OR NOT WEAR, E.G. GOING MAKEUP FREE) OVER THE NEXT WEEK! COMMENT BELOW WITH WHAT YOU’RE CONSIDERING DOING/WEARING!
T-shirt: Gift from Ann Krembs (I think it was H&M)
Cardigan: ASOS
Joggers: Marks & Spencer
Shoes: Finery c/o
Bag: House of Fraser
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Thank you for joining the #iwillwearwhatilike link up! This started as a campaign on Instagram in August 2015 where women over 30 wore everything on a journalist’s list of “inappropriate” items for 30+ women (including leopard print, short dresses and oversized sunglasses. Yes, really). It was so popular that I decided to carry it on weekly where women of all ages link up their fabulous style, never mind what anyone tells them not to wear!
The link up goes live every Monday at 3pm UK time and will stay open for a week. Whilst the original article was of course aimed at the 30+, you can be ANY age to link up. The only criteria is that you’re wearing whatever you damn well like!
Linking up etiquette…
CLICK HERE to read the rules of linking up (and to grab the #iwillwearwhatilike button). Basically it’s just good manners to link back to here – to leave a comment is even nicer!
Featured favourites
My favourite outfits from last week’s link up:
(L-R) C’s Evolution of Style | The Style Cheapskate | Style Splash
To get yourself featured next week, make sure you’ve included a link back to Not Dressed As Lamb or my button in your post/sidebar!
DO SHARE THE LOVE AND VISIT AS MANY LINKS AS YOU CAN (YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT OTHER LOVELY LIKE-MINDED LADIES YOU MIGHT MEET) – THE ORIGINAL INSTAGRAM CAMPAIGN FORGED SOME WONDERFUL NEW FRIENDSHIPS SO DON’T MISS OUT!
First, I want to congratulate you on once again being a trail blazing blogger. Doing a post sans makeup is fabulous and shows the world just how beautiful you truly are, makeup or not. Your casual outfit looks comfy, yet stylish and your handsome walking companion is a show stealer. Sending big hugs from America. Xo Jonet
http://www.FabulouslyChicOver50.com
I'm sure you've inspired many people, but at the very least, you have inspired me. When I first discovered your blog, and your 'I Will Wear What I Like' message last year, it was as though I'd finally been given permission to do just that! I've always loved vintage styles, and wished I could wear them, and suddenly I realised that there was nothing to stop me! So, I now wear what I want with abandon (a mix of vintage, retro and modern), because it makes me feel fabulous (even if others don't necessarily think I look fabulous), and that's what matters most.
Catherine you are an inspiration! Thank you continuing to share your style and your positivity. And for sticking up for those who cannot. You give me courage to be true to myself and my style. Keep it up!
Heidi || Wishes & Reality
"My outfits are not up for discussion" – but, but, but….it's a style/fashion blog! If your outfits aren't up for discussion then what is? I agree wholeheartedly that there is no place for bitchy, nasty personal remarks, but surely there is room for people to voice their preferences? Even if it's to say "looks good on you, but I wouldn't like it on me (for whatever reason".
My point is – I do not post my outfits simply to have people critique them. If no one said they liked my outfit then I'm not bothered, but I DO want people to say they've been inspired to get out of their comfort zone or try something new, or even just that they feel better about themselves and their own dress sense (however conservative or crazy it may be) because of my #iwillwearwhatilike message.
I didn't say people aren't allowed to discuss them – I totally get that people will comment on them – but that's not what I'm here for. Maybe I should rephrase "my outfits are not up for discussion" as "my outfits are not put up here for the sole purpose of having them critiqued", which is unfortunately what many people think ALL fashion blogs are for…! x
I'll share with you one of my favorite quotes…. "Don't let the bastards get you down!" You do you and forget about the haters. I think you are fabulous!
Amen to everything you've said, Catherine, both here and on Instagram. When I began my blog, I knew I'd be opening myself up to scrutiny but I never imagined how malicious some people could be. There are times when it still gets to me, I shan't lie, but I try to not let it linger. For too long. Thank you for writing this piece. As Eve tells me, sage soul that she is, "You do you, boo. And I'll do me. And to hell to whomever thinks they can tell us how to be, or not be". She's a wise one xoxo
I like your pictures and outfits. Also, what you write here is very true.
Yvonne
anywaychic.com
You are a doll, inside and out! I don't understand where people are coming from and I am glad it doesn't have to matter. What does matter is that you have influenced so many of us for good with your lovely outfits, your spunky attitude and your example of kindness and generosity. I think you look beautiful in these photos. Sometimes, my hubby tells me I'm pretty when I have on the grungiest clothes and my hair is in a tizzy and my make up is running because I am doing housework….and that is what matters. Thanks so much for being a real, actual woman and letting us come along for the ride. – Amy
http://stylingrannymama.com/
I love this post, I completely agree with you and love that you do these kinda posts. I love the pictures! You should have your dog with you more often
Lauren
livinginaboxx | bloglovin
Great post – I love that T-shir and its message (but gotta tell ya, that adorable dog is the best accessory). By proclamation attire is my hair – at 54, I dyed it blue, and haven't let it go yet (2 years later). It seems to broadcast confidence, and helps me stretch that comfort zone a lot. 🙂
So right Catherine. It's no one's business. Take the compliments. Ignore the negativity and wear what you like. I wore my leather trousers again and will continue to do so. Oh and in the post I've linked I've got on too much make up but I don't care.
This is such an inspiring post dear Catherine. You look lovely and just adorable. I did not realized that I actually wear a lot of dressed down styles on my blog. Supposed that is just me. And my Insta viewers have gotten to see quite a bit of my no-make up face. Because if there is anything I got to share with them I care more about the message that my face…*oopsie* Keep the fabulous posts coming! Have a lovely week. xo Sabina
I think every outfit should include "a slice of up yours";-) I started volunteering at a wildlife hospital yesterday and went straight from there to the school run covered in dirt and bird crap. Unlike the birds, I didn't give a shit. I'd thoroughly enjoyed myself and done something useful. Thank you so much for featuring me!
Emma xxx
http://www.style-splash.com
It's really simple & whenever I see rude comments on Instagram I always call out the culprit even though it usually invites a nasty response; Here's the test: Is it TRUE, Is it KIND, -and the biggie- Is it NECESSARY?? If the comment you're about to post doesn't pass these three criteria then keep your mouth shut! The point I make over & over is simply because that's your opinion doesn't mean you have to share it. Its like this is a revelation to some! Like it never occurred to them that they don't actually have to stop & take the time to type out that completely irrelevant comment they just made…just because that's what popped into their head??? It never ceases to amaze me but I continue being the Instagram police in my small corner of cyberspace (I only follow about 60 carefully selected people). Thanks for your thoughtful content on this & all subjects.
Fabulous post, and I actually love this outfit! The graphic tee is great and I love those shoes. Even when you try not to be fashionable, you still are!
Just sunday it took me a long time to decide to wear a pair of shorts to take my children to a party in the park… In the end I thought "meh. whatever. #IwillwearwhatIlike". And so I did, surprising myself. Who knew? (thinking back, I should have taken a picture and shared it)
Thanks
Chiarina
I forgot to say that I know you don't fish for compliments, but you look really fresh and naturally beautiful with no make up.
A great post Catherine, I admire how you've dealt with such horribleness; it's a great attitude to have. I can't believe how people can be such bitches sometimes!
I'm very inspired by your self-confidence, and wish I was the same, although I'm working on it. Luckily, despite how I feel inside, I don't let it bother me with what I wear and always wear what I like! I'm the opposite of Kerry (in the comment above) and don't mind the photos, but would never be able to speak to a room full of strangers!
Helen xx
http://www.whenIgrowupblog.com
I have never, nor would never, criticise someone for something so shallow as appearance/outfits. If I dont like something, I scroll past, simple!
I am a real contradiction when it comes to confidence. I am so very confident in so many areas of my life (work/relationship/motherhood/etc) yet have tried to avoid having my photo taken all of my life. I HATE it. I think for me, Iv never been 100% confident in my appearance, so to have a photo taken, freezes that moment and, quite frankly, I dont want to see it. Im uncomfortable receiving compliments, I self-depreciate, I fear ridicule, so I suppose thats why I dont put myself out there like that. It drives my husband mad. I am trying really hard to put odd pictures up on my Instagram or blog, but if Im honest, it gives me massive anxiety. I push myself to do the odd one as I believe in self growth, but its very uncomfortable for me. Stick me in a room full of 1000 strangers and tell me I need to deliver a talk/speech etc, no worries, ask me to have a photo of myself taken, breathing issues. Weird eh! Id love just a teeny tiny ounce of your confidence and self assurance Catherine, so, if you could pop a little in the post, that would be amazing please and thank you
hahah xx
Kerry x
Unbelievable! I am still reeling with shock at what you have been through. You do not deserve any of that and I love the way you dealt with it. I would really like to know who thinks they have the right to criticise other bloggers clothes and share them on their feed. What bitter, unhappy people they must be. I wonder if the green eyed monster has reared its ugly head because you've just won an well deserved award?! I do hope these trolls aren't English as it does seem to be a peculiarly British thing to do – knock people down when they're up. Anyway, lovely Catherine, you're beautiful whatever you wear 'cause it all comes from inside, as we who wear what we like know. Sad that others are so judgemental of playing dress up, which us lot obviously don't take as seriously as they seem to do. By the way I am rocking very torn jeans on Instagram this week, bring it on trolls, #iwillwearwhatilike Well done Catherine, keep it up, we're all behind you. xx
You look beautiful!! Let me correct myself. You are beautiful!! And you know what, beauty is as beauty does. Beauty shines through a smile and eyes. Confidence and caring shine through too.
Let's keep up this fight until all of us are finding the beauty in all of us! Right!?
Big hug to you Catherine.
Love, Annie
Great post. And you look very pretty and relaxed dressed down.
I'm also glad you broached the subject of self-confidence. I lost most of my hair due to trich and stress. So…part of what I wear as part of my daily wardrobe are wigs. I had been so self-conscience of my thinning and balding head that it was becoming all-consuming. I used products to hide the loss and when that wasn't enough I had to wear extensions and toppers. And when the loss got worse I had to make the transition to wigs. At first I though "Holy shit–what will others think of me? What will they say"? Then I realized I didn't care. I'm doing this for MY confidence and not theirs. Now I wear my wigs proudly. My co-workers love when I come in with short bobs! My Frenchman loves my "hair" on the wavy side! It's fun. I've turned something that made me self conscience into something that has given me self-confidence. It's a good thing! Thanks for a nice post.
I am in total agreement with your message. Self confidence is the best outfit! Supporting other women is the best of the blogging world. Reading your post today was the high point of my day. Bullying and abuse have no place in the sacred spaces of creativity.
I love this outfit…from the relaxed hair and minimal makeup, the tee, the adorable pants and the comfy shoes. I think this also proves that you can be completely comfortable and still look put together! And thank you for the reminders about self-confidence. I confess I'm guilty about caring far too much about what people think. #peoplepleaser. However, it's getting better and quite honestly a lot is due to this blogging adventure I'm on.
Now I'm a small fish in a big pond so I haven't encountered any trolls (I chuckled often throughout your post) – yet. But if and when I do, I will remember your post.
Thank you!
I will never, ever understand why so many women seem to enjoy cutting each other down this way, dearest Catherine…and I think the relative anonymity of the internet has probably only made it worse. We're all allowed to have our personal opinions about things – of course! – but there is absolutely NO excuse for this kind of mean-spirited, "trollish" behaviour. P.S. I'll have an outfit post coming up soon featuring a crop top that shows off a serious bit of my belly; some people may find it "inappropriate", but I am definitely ALL about #iwillwearwhatilike !!
http://www.StyleIsMyPudding.com
I think these are some of your best pics ever! You are so naturally beautiful. It also helps that Riley is a handsome brute!
Good for you Catherine. I couldn´t agree more. I am make up free most of the time. I always do my eyes a little bit if I am going out, but in the heat the eye pencil ends up down my cheak anyway, hahahhaha.
Much love
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
So I've back tracked and read through the recent posts and events and find it pathetic, sickening that women get their kicks this way. It reminds me of the bullies at school who used to pick on me for wearing out of the ordinary clothes.
Catherine I love your strength and forthright nature and also your desire to defend those who are more sensitive than yourself. The joy of one's little corner of the web aka one's blog is that we can and ought to be free to do and wear what we want. That's not an open invitation to gatecrashers who want to be foul mouthed and nasty. These tragic souls really ought to get a life.
Anna x
I love the message on your tee! And I like seeing casual outfits as that's what I wear most of the time, and it's always fun to get ideas…
It's sad to me that women our age are often still quite quick to judge and tear others down rather than build them up. I just don't get why someone would take the time to tell someone they don't like what they wear. I have gotten long emails outlining multiple things I'm doing wrong. I don't take it personally and just as someone's opinion, but it's certainly an opinion I didn't ask for…
Yes Yes yes Catherine well said and to the point!
Take that you trolls!
best
Ashley xx
Fab casual look Catherine, love it…clearly! �� Love the message too…soo true ����
Sarah aka Badassbabyboomer
Another great post Catherine! I read your post a few times on Saturday as to not miss a word and today is a great follow up. I recently published a post titled Real Mom Boho Style, which I linked above in your link up. It was one of those days when a inspiring outfit was not going to happen and I needed to get my post out. Sure, my outfit could have been tuned up in many ways, which I knew, but there was simply no time for that in my day. So, I simply posted exactly what I was wearing and doing that day – ponytail, supersize soda, Birkenstocks and all. Bottom line is love what you wear, and own it – and the rest who cares? Nasty people are bullies, and they're issues are entirely their own – we do not need to own them. And by the way, I love this post, you look fabulous no matter what and your inner beauty an confidence radiates in whatever you have on!
XO
Suzanne
http://www.AskSuzanneBell.com
Excellent post my beautiful friend. There is far too much ugliness in the world right now without us spreading even more on an individual level. I have been trolled before and I tracked the woman down (she was our age too). I gave her the opportunity to speak up in the blog post I wrote about it and not surprisingly, she declined. That's the thing about the majority of mean people; they are all in until someone straight up confronts them on it. I have made it one of my missions in life to confront blatant nastiness whenever I see it and I'm so happy that you are too. The more of us there are, the more ugliness we can overcome. And btw, whether it's relevant or not, you are absolutely stunning with or without makeup. xo
Debbie
http://www.fashionfairydust.com
You always know how to bring on the hmmmms and controversial subjects Catherine.
Self confidence is that whole self love thing. And I'm not sure why it's so hard for us to embrace it—you'd think it'd get easier as we've gotten older. Although society's love for the young probably has a little to do with that point!
But as to your issue to wear something we wish we would…I can almost say, that's been my history in blogging.
When I first started, I was so conservative, and thought there was only one way to dress correctly. But now, I've embraced boho, maxis, hats & brooches (which I thought were old fashioned) among many others. Next thing you know I'll be wearing birks….LOL!!
Jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
So beautifully said on all your platforms Catherine, really makes those sad women look small & inarticulate. Reminds me of a saying my Dad uses when referring to people like that "You can't educate mugs"
And although it goes without saying, I agree with Liz, you're as gorgeous barefaced as dressed up xxx
Its so simple for me. I like your blog. I like the things you write about, I like that you teach us things from time to time, I like your outfits and other than that it is what it is. Fun to visit your blog. I'm a little afraid at this point of getting trolled upon but at the end of the day, I am one tough cookie and it takes a lot to smack me down. I was teased so much growing up and even then had a thick skin. But I like your perspective that we need to fight the good fight for those who may be vulnerable. One way I try to combat bullies, is by spreading love. I try to comment as often as I can on everything I have time for. Not just the popular ones but all of them. Instagram for instance, it only takes a fraction of a second to tap that little heart and it cam make all the difference to someone who is testing the waters and a little afraid of judgment. I know because I was there (still am sort of). On twitter it only take a moment to hit retweet and again it can mean a lot to others. The list goes on. The one place I don't like to go is Facebook. I have never warmed up to it and prefer to only go to groups that I am fairly sure are in line with my interests. To me Facebook is a breeding ground for bullies. I've seen and felt it. I avoid it. Anyway, I'm with you. Lets be who we are and lets embrace each other and when necessary protect and stick up for each other. Peace!
Cheryl Tucker
http://www.northwestmountainliving.com
Cheryl you're the perfect example of how women should be empowering other women!! You're spreading happiness and confidence to others, and that's what it's all about xoxo
(I do tend to agree with you about Facebook being somewhat awful, but it's popular among women our age so my aim is to create a positive space in that area of the internet, hence why I get so riled about trolls entering my happy place)!!
I love your pictures make-up free, Catherine, you look great and happy! I complied with your message without knowing as I went make-up free to go into town and also wore a dress which showed off my "food baby" but I felt confident and decided that I did not mind if people think I have a tummy or I am pregnant. I had a baby less than 2 years ago and also suffer sometimes from stomach issues so sucking it in is not very comfortable and today I realized that I should try more often to let it go. Thanks for the encouraging words!
Szilaska thank you – and that's fantastic that you went makeup-free and threw caution to the wind where your food baby was concerned… I'm sure no one cared at ALL (I mean that in the nicest possible way of course)!! x
Wise words Catherine and you look just as gorgeous dressed down as you dressed up. Your skin and face are beautIful. And yes, self-confidence is a wonderful and very attractive trait. Thank you for hosting the link-up, love Liz xxx http://www.whatlizzyloves.com xxx
Liz you're an aaaaaaabsolute sweetheart as always… thank you for the kind words and support! xoxo
Such a great post, Catherine. And I love that you've just shot photos of the 'everyday' you, which, incidentally, are still as beautiful as when you're all dressed up!
Suzy xx
http://www.suzyturner.com
Aww Suzy thank you – maybe I should post more of them!! 😉 x
I'm learning!!! I def don't want to be put-down, but I do like talking fashion!!! 🙂 I like how everyone is dif, but putting it out there!!!
Us all being different is what makes us more interesting!!
You are so right and it took me forever to have that-finally at 66 I think I am there. Love your message today. I knew if I went out and sheared one of my Shetland sheep, you would publish-and it worked!
It's never too late, Teresa – as you've proved!! x