Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Self Image | Learning to Love My Worst Feature

Learning to love my worst feature
If you follow my Facebook page you may have seen a Musings Mondays post where I mused upon those who embraced their "worst" feature. Or rather, the feature that is deemed unattractive or even unacceptable (by others) in today's society. The response was overwhelming, and so many inspiring opinions and thoughts really got me thinking more about it.

For me, my "worst" feature has always been my nose. Now I'm not looking for compliments or cries of "but you haven't got an awful nose" at all - that's not the point of this post. Coming to the conclusion that you can learn to love the very thing you've hated about yourself for so long is what I've been mulling over.

I think I'm right in saying that a lot of women have a part of themselves that they'd change if they could. I'm talking about the body parts that only surgery can alter, or are even impossible to do anything about (your height, for example). And for me - especially growing up - it was my nose.

I used to get the odd "Barry Manilow" dig from other kids; luckily it didn't surmount to bullying or even have an impact on my self-confidence. I knew perfectly well I didn't have a teeny tiny button nose, and, well, I couldn't do much about it - so I simply accepted it. But I could get, if I'd wanted, a nose job. I thought about it many times over the years, but the expense was usually the thing that stopped me seriously considering it.

Until recently.

Redhead profile - before and after
When I hit my 30s and actually found myself with a little disposable income - enough to actually go through with it, I found myself thinking that it wasn't such a good idea after all. I'd always dreamed of having the same sort of nose, but just a bit smaller. So that I still looked like me. In other words, something like the one on the left (above). On the right, my nose; on the left, my "ideal", Photoshopped nose.

The thing is, did you notice that there was a difference? I showed the mirror image to my husband and asked if he noticed anything at all, and he didn't catch on at first. Which proved to me two things: 1. In my head I think there's a huge difference between how I think my nose looks (i.e. huge and with a big bump in it) and what I'd like it to look like (smaller and straighter). 2. That if my own husband can't immediately see a massive difference when I've "had a nose job" - is it really worth the time, money and pain?

There are many examples of celebrities who have bowed to the pressure and had work done. You may have read in the last day or two how Renée Zellweger was virtually unrecognisable at an event this week - I personally don't think she looks terrible like many of the comments I've read, but I think it's obvious that she's had her eyes opened up. Gone are the cute squinting eyes she was so well known for; now those same eyes aren't Renée's (or Bridget's) any more. The same happened to Jennifer Grey after having a nose job: she said in an interview that having plastic surgery was the worst mistake she ever made. She was no longer recognisable as Baby from Dirty Dancing, just somebody who looked a bit like her.

Renee Zellweger
So my fear is of "not looking like me" any more. Sure, I may end up with a cuter nose, it'll be straighter and my profile won't be quite as "strong" - but at the ripe old age of 42 I've decided that my strong profile is what makes me look like me. I definitely don't want to end up looking like a homogenised version of myself.

There are, however, some female celebrities who haven't had work done, despite being told to do so. Cindy Crawford didn't get her mole removed, and Georgia May Jagger kept the gap in her teeth. Both reasonably easy procedures (no major surgery), but for both of them it's their trademark and what's contributed to their individuality and their success.

The women I've grown to admire over the years with the same strong noses as me are Barbra Streisand (below, left) and Anjelica Huston (below, right). Would Streisand have been as successful if she'd had her nose done? Probably not. Anjelica Huston was told to get a nose job by Eileen Ford when she started modelling but she refused. Thank goodness she did: I can't imagine Morticia Addams having a cute button nose, yet she couldn't have looked any more beautiful in that film if she tried.

Barbra Streisand and Anjelica Huston
While I'm focusing on noses, it's interesting to note that these women often had photos taken that emphasised the very feature they were told to get fixed. I've noticed I've done it myself in some of my recent shoots; sometimes a strong composition is needed, and a profile shot that includes a strong nose certainly helps.

So I'm sticking with this nose. If I'm not bothered when someone doesn't like the way I dress, why should I care if they don't like parts of my face?

If you have a feature that you (or others!) feel strongly about then do let me know about it in the comments... I'd love to know your views.
Catherine x
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P.S. If you want to see some of the outfit posts where I've featured a strong profile picture, see herehere and here.

Linking up to: Let It Shine, Friday's Fab Favourites,  All About You

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74 comments

  1. Great post Catherine, I've always had a nose issue too, one of my nicknames at school was also "Barry Manilow" and also "chinky" as I have quite small eyes that like Renee above that are very hooded. But like you I have learnt to live with the nose issue even though I hated it more than anything, with age it doesn't actually bother me anymore. But the hooded eyes have with age got worse and I have briefly contemplated surgery once or twice but going back to Renee's face I dont think I will bother, shes unrecognisable xx

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    1. Gosh kids are horrid, aren't they Gail?!! I'm glad you've learnt to love your nose too, and that's interesting that Renee's face has made you think twice about your eyes. So much to think about... thank you hun x

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  2. Are you kidding me Catherine?! You are one of the most gorgeous women I know! I don't notice things like that on people...I look at them for who they are. Even though I've never met you in person, you seem like you are down to earth and someone I would love to have tea with sometime! :) Focus on your fabulous figure, long legs and beautiful face my friend! Hugs!
    Stephanie
    http://positivelystephanie.blogspot.com/

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    1. Aww thanks Stephanie, though remember I wasn't fishing for compliments (but I accept them graciously)! It's definitely true that things we think are really obvious about ourselves are almost non-existent to others. Hugs back atcha xx

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  3. Stick with your nose - I love that idea! I am not judging women who've changed their feature -- their bodies, their choices. But I love a natural nose any day. And btw, yours is fab. xox

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    1. And nor do I Patti - I thought about talking about that (women who choose to go through with surgery and are super pleased with the outcome) - but as it was purely from my point of view it's probably a whole other topic for discussion. And I'm glad you like me sticking with my nose... thank you!!

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  4. I am so glad you have learned to love yourself just the way you are which is gorgeous. Funny - I had my nose too because it's so flat.

    Alice
    www.happinessatmidlife.com

    P.S. Hope to see you tomorrow for TBT Fashion link up.

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    1. Thanks so much Alice... though wouldn't you agree if you changed your nose you wouldn't look like your lovely self either?! We're all so silly really aren't we ;)

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  5. My grandmother thought the bump on her nose should be removed so she finally did it, a week later my little sister walked in and Grandma said, "There's my nose! At least one of us still has it!" She wasn't even healed from the surgery and already saw the beauty in her first nose. Funny enough, it is probably my sister's favorite feature. :o)

    Oh, and I totally didn't see the difference in the mirror image until you brought it up!

    JJ
    www.dressupnotdown.blogspot.com

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    1. Wow that's really interesting about your grandma, JJ! And the fact that your sis loves her nose too. Funny that you didn't see the difference either! Thanks sweetie x

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  6. I did not see the difference in the mirror pictures. You are smart!
    Anyway, I don't like my teeth but they are healthy so I don't know whether to go for bracelet or not.

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    1. Aww thank you Martina :) I approach teeth with a slightly different attitude... I always think that everyone looks better with good teeth - but as you say yours are healthy! As long as you're not harming them then why not get braces? Not quite the same as having major surgery, so do what feels right for you!

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  7. I have also struggled with my nose over the years, but like you I have actually started to like it. Now most of my favorite photos of myself are profile shots :). It's those differences that make us unique and interesting.

    Tamara
    www.trulytamara.com

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    1. Seems you've had the same sort of acceptance as I've had as I've got older, Tamara - our noses make us more unique! And yes I'm quite happy about profile shots too. So weird as I would have avoided them like the plague when I was younger. Thanks for your great comment hun x

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  8. every feature of you is fab! :) you are stunning!

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  9. Wonderful post, Catherine. Any kind of pressure we people feel from "society" is damaging. Why not everyone "has" to be artistically expressive and creative, for instance, but everyone is "expected" to be financially smart and successful? Same goes with shapes and sizes of our bodies and facial features. Why should there be "the right" size or shape of anything? I had my insecurities as a teen - I remember hating my teeth, skin and hair when I was around 13. It took a while, but I learned to accept and love myself. At some point, a couple of friends commented on my small lips. I did not even think about my lips size until they commented. I actually liked my lips and was really surprised that someone found them "too small". Too small for what? I never wanted to change my lips, but those unkind comments stuck in my head for years. I later told my husband about it, and his reply was "I LOVE your lips"... There always is someone wonderful for each of us who will be crazy about us just the way we are - the whole point of Bridget Jones, isn't it? But the most important that you are crazy about yourself just the way you are... while also accepting the wide variety around you. Why nature even does all this variety thing anyway, why not just copypaste us all?

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    1. I was exactly the same about my nose (as your lips) Natalia - I think I was about 12 when some unpleasant kids called me Barry Manilow. I'd never thought before that first taunt that I had a big nose (I guess we do have littler noses when we're very small) and it really stuck with me. How wonderful that your husband loves your lips!! Thank you for such a great comment, it's so interesting to hear everyone's stories and opinions! x

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    1. I am part Jewish so that explains mine, Stephanie... that's so brilliant that you love yours too!! x

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  11. You look great!! I don't want to sound rude, but the photo-shopped nose looks so generic to me! I like your nose way better. But, as always, everyone should do what they want :)

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    1. Not taken as rude at all, sweetie - I know what you meant! And yes I agree that it IS generic because I've designed a nose according to what is deemed "attractive" in today's society. I also agree that we should all do what we want, and I just decided surgery wasn't for me. There are too many shoes that I want more than a new nose...!!!!!!!!!

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  12. It is funny how we can be consumed by the parts we hate/dislike instead of embracing the parts we love. For me it has always been the chin and I still think about it everyday. ( especially the older I get). I am not sure I will ever get there 100% but I also am not sure I want to spend the money and take a chance so instead I focus on my positives and never post true side profile pics.

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    1. Isn't it crazy, Linda, that we spend so much time worrying about these things about ourselves... I'm sure if all the women who disliked a particular feature about themselves asked 100 strangers what part of them they noticed first, that the feature wasn't one of the things they singled out. I'm pretty sure (with the exception of internet trolls!) that most people see the positives in others above all else. I've seen quite a few pictures of you and your chin has never come to my attention. I've always thought, "Linda: great hair, great smile". So there's the proof! Thank you for a great comment, and I hope you get there and continue to focus on all the bits you love! x

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  13. I look at those photos and I think, you look better with your nose of origin. Absolutely beautiful. Blogging is good like that, we can come round to ourselves. For me, it's been broad shoulders that I've embraced, over time, and very much from and with the support of my readers.

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    1. Thank you for complimenting my nose, Lisa...! ;) And to be honest I think broad shoulders sound terrific - a sign of strength. They'll keep you upright and strong as you age, I'm sure - not a bad thing at all!! x

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  14. Lots of food for thought here! I love your posts ^_^ I think that people are free to do everything with their own bodies, if you don't like something and what to change it, that's fine, but I have a feeling that's the easy way. Again, life isn't suppose to be always hard and shitty, you can take the easy way and transform your features, or you can take the hard way and learn to love yourself with whatever you've got.
    I find complete symmetry to be kind of creepy, I feel that faces with asymmetry, with "defects" have more character and are more expressive and in turn more eye catching, than a generic pretty face. I don't like my nose either by the way, I've always admired those cute button noses, like Vivien Leigh from Gone With the Wind. But I've never even thought about doing surgery and it's not just about the money, it's about what you said, my nose is mine, it makes me, ME, so I'm not changing that :D

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    1. I think we'll always have things about our faces that we don't like, Keit - and it might explain why some celebrities (who can afford to have endless surgery) just don't don't know when to stop, and then it's too late because they've ruined their faces! I think even if I had my nose done I'd still find other faces (noses) I preferred, so that's why I know it's the right decision for me. Thank you lovely lady! x

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  15. I think you look beautiful! I didn't even spot the difference until I read your post. I think we all have issues with parts of our bodies, yet the majority of the time what we see as a 'terrible' feature goes totally unnoticed by other people. Even Audrey Hepburn thought that her feet were too large, she was too thin and that the bump on her nose was ugly, but without all of these features I don't think she would have been such a jaw dropping beauty.
    I also think that plastic surgery can sometimes strip the personality from a person's face. I used to have a large mole on my chin which had to be removed for medical reasons. I used to hate that mole, yet now, well now I kind of miss it. It was part of what made me 'me'.
    All the best
    Michelle Lyndon-Dykes

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    1. You've hit the nail on the head with those first two sentences, Michelle - I couldn't have put it better myself! My before and after nose proved that I saw my new nose as a major improvement and yet pretty much no one else saw a difference, so my real nose can't be that bad after all. And I'm sorry for the loss of your mole... my sister had several moles removed from her face when she was younger (she'll admit out of vanity) - and one unfortunately left a big scar on the side of her nose because it was done badly. Better the devil you know and all that...!!! Thanks for your fantastic comments x

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    2. (Reading back I actually meant the third and fourth sentences... didn't mean to toot my own horn there!!)

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  16. Oh please keep your nose just as it is! It sounds like you will. I have a few parts I'd like to change about myself but whenever I think, Would I rather have X altered or would I rather own a Cartier watch/Kelly bag/vintage Mercedes/fill in whatever expensive luxury item you like, I always side on keeping my face the way it is and choosing the luxury item! Not that I've bought any of the above, but they would certainly win out over cosmetic surgery. I am so sad Renee changed her face. I wish these Hollywood gals would let themselves age naturally and leave the fixes alone. Nicole Kidman didn't do herself any favors with that Botox business and I hope she never goes that route again! Great provocative post, Catherine, keep up the excellent work! XO, Jill

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    1. Okay, I'll keep the nose, Jill! ;) And yes to buying all those things you mentioned instead. And oh gosh Nicole Kidman's forehead is a travesty... contrary to what I may have suggested in the post I do believe that everyone should do whatever they feel is right for them, as long as they do it for the right reasons (having a boob job to please a man is not a right reason, for example). But as I mentioned to Keit above, I think that as celebrities can afford to have everything done, they often don't know when to stop. Us non-celebs have to think long and hard about whether the £5k+ needed for a boob job/nose job/facelift is worth it, so we are probably better at making good decisions.
      Thank you for your great comments and kind words, always appreciated! x

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  17. You have the same kind of profile as me. I used to hate it and now I don't - it's a fantastic skeleton for growing old against as our point bones keep our skin taut!

    On a more profound note, there's no way would I risk an op for vanity purposes. I'd rather save the GA risk for something that I actually need, should that ever be the case. And if that were the case, I am sure that a witchy profile (that was my school taunt) will be the least of my worries!

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    1. To prove my point, here's me on my wedding day last year. Same profile :)

      http://s1167.photobucket.com/user/j0hnbarker/media/9686202236_777d222241_z_zpsee093b37.jpg.html

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    2. I see what you mean about a similar profile, hun - but I absolutely can't work out WHY they would have called you such names?!! Maybe all things look exaggeratedly larger to kids because they're small! It's great that you've come around to the same sort of thinking, and I like your reasoning...!!!! Not thought of that! Thanks so much for commenting :)

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  18. Yet another vote for your existing nose fromme! When I was at school I was always being teased about my freckles. I quite like them now as they say women of a certain age get age spots - but I've had mine since I was a child, so can't tell the difference! I was also called Suzy Wong because of my small eyes (by an adult, not another child) which I did find hurtful, and I guess if I was spending money that's what I'd spend them on. But what the heck - I've been like this for 67 years so I guess that I'll just live with my face and spend money on another bright lipstick to cheer me up!

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    1. My space bar has started having a mind of its own - that should have read from me!

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    2. I should have added that there's nothing wrong with looking Chinese (a dear friend of mine was Chinese and incredibly beautiful) however to be referred to in that way when I'm NOT Chinese - and for a particular feature - was different.

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    3. Firstly Sue I LOVE, no ADORE freckles... I wish my face were covered even more with them! And secondly, yay to the bright lipstick instead! I understood what you meant about the Chinese look - it was the fact that it was used as a derogatory term that's so awful. I agree about Chinese women being so beautiful (Lucy Liu anyone)?! My cousin married a beautiful Chinese girl - she's in her 50s and I'm not kidding, she looks younger than me - like *seriously* younger than me...!! So take it as a compliment! Thank you for sharing your thoughts xx

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  19. Brilliant post Catherine, so very honest. You are stunning and your nose for me just adds to the shape and angles of your beautiful face. It has taken me until my 40's to be comfortable with my 5'11 height and I love it now, its a shame I have wasted all those years being conscious of it. The wisdom of age!! xx

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    1. Amanda thank you, and wow to being so tall and embracing it at last - I know it's hard for tall girls to stand straight as so many of them end up stopping and have really bad posture. I'm glad you've decided at last it's a positive, and thanks so much for your comments!

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  20. I treated this post as a spot the difference before reading the post, and I could not find it! So the difference is not that noticeable ! Your nose is ok

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    1. Aww thanks Laurie - I really thought it was so obvious (as a "spot the difference") but it just goes to show how everyone else sees you differently...!

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  21. There is nothing I can add but Amen. Totally agree with you. I had lots of features I wanted changed growing up, but there was no specific feature they teased me with. Just called me ugly or skinny. Problem with my character is, it hurt. But... I kept bouncing back, never had anything changed (only brought back in its usual shape haha) and I am glad of that.
    You are now you, splendid you. After a nose job you will become more like 13 in a dozen as they say in Holland.
    Greetje

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    1. I love that "13 in a dozen" expression, Greetje! The Dutch have such great expressions!!

      Yet more horrid comments that someone suffered as a kid... I'm sorry to hear it hurt, but also glad to know you bounced back. You're made of strong stuff - and showing them all how to look fantastic in your 50s is the best revenge - I bet those same kids don't look so great now!! C x

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    2. Strangely enough, the two biggest bullies went really wrong in life. One was a junky for many years and the other one is in jail for embezzlement. Really .. You get what you give.

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    3. Wow... you're right, that's karma for you right there!!!!

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  22. It is my first time on your blog, it is great! I think you are very beautiful and I am glad you have "made peace" with your nose x #allaboutyou

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    1. Aby thank you, that's so kind of you. Hope to see you again sometime soon! x

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  23. I wish I had longer legs, dearest Catherine!! But even plastic surgery can't fix that...so I guess I just have to be okay with the ones that I DO have!! ;) P.S. I think I'm the only person on the planet who thinks René doesn't really look different at all!!

    www.StyleIsMyPudding.blogspot.com

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    1. But isn't that funny, Monika - I think you just wouldn't be the same if you were 5'10" - you being petite is what makes you "you", and so fabulous to boot! Funny what you said about Renee, I didn't think she looked awful, just different. Keith said he wouldn't have recognised her in a million years. I always loved her eyes, I think it's a shame they've gone!

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  24. Such a powerful and honest post Catherine! And my goodness me, I can't tell you how thrilled I am that you are sticking with the nose that you were born with, because I have to tell you it is fabulous! Truly it is. Your face has a certain majestic quality about it, that I adore and your nose is part of that!

    I know we all have bits about ourselves that we don't particularly like or that are not 'perfect' however I think it's SO important that we try to learn to love our bodies, warts, small boobs, stretchmarks or prominent noses an' all! ;-)

    It's so easy to fall for the crap that we are fed on a daily basis by the media machine that we should all look a certain way to be beautiful, but being ourselves, accepting who we are and making the most of both the bits that we love AND hate is what sets us apart from everyone else and makes us unique.

    Thanks so much for sharing such a honest post and for linking up to #AllAboutYou xxx

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    1. Oh Kate thank you, that's so nice of you!!! You're right that we are fed by a lot of crap by the media, but that's why I always admired people like Barbra when I was young. I still think that everyone should do what's right for them (and if surgery is right for them then I say go for it) - but I was always only ever about 50% sure. In a way I'm glad I could never afford it, now that I look back! x

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  25. You are so right, and it is interesting that we tend to come to self-acceptance with age - ah, youth really is wasted on the young! I was an "early developer" and was teased about my boobs constantly, and wished I could have a reduction. I was also petite, which I would have loved to change, but when I really thought about the surgery for breast reduction, and about taking steroids to make me grow an inch or a half, I realized by the time I was in my early twenties and in my "screw you all " phase, that I was actually comfortable in my own body, I just needed to realize that other people had a problem with me, and I refused to let it affect me any longer.

    I think that you have a beautiful profile (and yes, I know that you weren't asking for compliments, however I did think it as soon as I saw the picture, even without reading the post!). Interesting you mention Barbara Streisand - I remember an interview with her where she said that had she succumbed to the pressure to have a nose job her voice would never have sounded the same again. We are who we are, precisely because of who we are.

    Thanks so much for linking to #AllAboutYou

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    1. Thank you Zaz for your lovely comments and sharing your experiences! I love the fact that you got to a "screw you all" phase... I'm a bit like that myself (tending to do the opposite of what I'm expected/told to do)!! Funnily enough I was an early developer too and got teased a bit about having big boobs too. Since learning how to dress them properly (only in the last 10 years or so, mind) they're not a worry to me any more!

      I didn't know that about Barbra! Makes me love her even more. And thank you for being so sweet. I know I said please don't pay me compliments but I'll never dismiss one... thank you so much!! x

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  26. For me it's that I'm very waif-like in appearance. I am tall and thin and have long arms (I measured my wingspan and they are 2 inches longer than my height!) and my entire life I've wished for curves. Curves that I only start to get when I eat A LOT as in 3-4000 calories a day, and lift weights but when I take it easy, it falls back off me and I'm thin and bony again. I have a long neck (was called giraffe neck in junior high) and pronounced collar bones and long gangly arms and skinny hands (a friend calls them sliver hands because they're so narrow). I used to always feel very insecure about my body. Very unfeminine, and unsexy. More skeletal than lovely. But the more I age (I'm 30 now) the more I realize it is beautiful. I have an easy time ordering from catalogs because clothing fits me the way it fits the catalog models (except Victorias Secret since I'm pretty flat chested), and when I do finally have children, I will likely lose the weight quickly. Also, I can squeeze through tight spots when someone parks too close to me, and on one occasion, I squeezed myself through a locked gate to let myself in the back door after I locked my keys in my house. HAHAHA!

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    1. Lana isn't it a shame that most of us want the opposite of what we have? Flat chested girls want bigger boobs, busty ones want smaller ones... you get my drift. There are good and bad points about every shape and size when it comes to comfort or practicality I've realised - I love that you've realised that clothes hang well on you and even more brilliant that you can get through a locked gate - that's amazing!!!

      Though not extreme, I have curves: I have problems buying bras (I always have to buy really expensive ones to get my size) and my waist-to-hip ratio is pretty big so most trousers fit me on the hips and then gape at the waist. But I always get lots of compliments about my tiny waist so then that sort of makes up for it! So as I said, every shape and size has different problems and plus points too, but that's what makes us all so interesting and unique... it's good to hear you love yourself just the way you are. Thanks so much for coming by and commenting...!! x

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  27. I have the same obsession with my nose and as I age more now a bit with my eyes. After going through my worst nightmare imaginable...
    http://suzannecarillo.com/it-went-fineup-until-the-surgery/
    It would be hard if not impossible to convince me to ever opt in to have any kind of invasive surgery done again. Even when they tell you it's nothing, it's a standard surgery, you never know what you'll be left with, how your body will react or how it will all turn out. It could impact your health for the rest of your life, or you could simply never make it out of surgery. People don't think about that...but it happens, and more often than they tell you it does.

    There are things in life that we take for granted every day that are much more important than a bump on the nose.

    Glad you have come to this decision. It could be saving you loads of problems and heartache down the road.

    bisous
    Suzanne
    http://www.suzannecarillo.com

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    1. Gosh, Suzanne, after reading it that sounded really traumatic... I can see how you came to the conclusion that you don't want any more surgery. Funnily enough the thought of something going wrong didn't occur to me (or maybe it did and I was trying to ignore the feeling); I was more concerned with whether I'd like the result and how it would affect the way I felt about myself in a Jennifer Grey kind of way.

      Thanks for such a great comment, and having seen some horrible results of plastic surgery gone wrong on TV since I wrote this I'm pretty certain I ain't ever going there!! Thank you for commenting and for such a poignant and sensible pont of view, I'm sorry you had such a horrible time xx

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  28. I really love Barry Manilow and think he's cute, nose included! I've struggled with various aspects of my appearance. At school I was mostly picked on for not looking as feminine as all my school friends. A lot of that was just because I didn't wear make up (and for the most part I still don't). I was made to feel so ugly even though I always loved the look of a very masculine girl (although I myself was never all that masculine really). I have worked through every body issue I've had and I feel so good about myself and other people now. It really is so freeing. Life is so beautiful when you think everyone is beautiful!

    Actually, I've made a couple of relevant posts of my own about this topic, so I will link them in case you're interested!

    1. How To Stop Being Ugly (this one involves some delightful funny faces).
    2. Loving Yourself From Every Angle,

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    1. Lil that is such a lovely attitude - to think that everyone is beautiful... it's definitely just personalities that I see as ugly or beautiful now that I'm older and wiser. It's so good to hear how accepting you are of yourself - I'll check out your posts! C x

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  29. Its quite hard to see the difference in those 2 pics. All that money, recovery would be for very little change (nothing wrong with what you have). When you see celebs go too far, it just looks horrible and they can't go back to their original gorgeous self.

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    1. I think my husband's reaction says it all, Natalie... if he couldn't see the difference, no one else would! I still think it's entirely up to the individual, but as with so many things hindsight would be a wonderful luxury!!

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  30. Wow! What a powerful and original post. I went to school with a friend who also had a strong nose. She used to complain about the size of her nose, and I once said to her that her nose suited her perfectly. Any other nose would not fit her face as perfectly as the nose she was born with. I remember her being so thankful to me for saying those words, and she now sports a nose stud in her perfect nose. The only reason I said this to her was because I also have a 'strong' nose, and my mum said this to me. I was never as convinced about my nose, but I know that my profile, and therefore my face would be so vastly different with any other nose. So like you, I would never change that particular feature (or any others, for that matter). These imperfections make us us, and that is truly a beautiful thing. Right, I'm now off to share this terrific post on my social media. Thank you for your brilliantly-written words x

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    1. Fiona thank you, I'm really glad you liked it! I completely agree with you about another nose not suiting your (meaning "our") face. It makes me wonder how children of parents who've had surgery view their similar features? If my mum had had a nose job on her strong nose would I have thought differently and gone ahead with it? Makes you think...!

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  31. I'm all about the characters, perfection is boring, you are stunning lady. I have big features and that's me, love how positive this post is and it makes me sad how so many like Renee feel the pressure to change themselves beyond recognition. I think she looks great in both photos but to me, she didn't need to change a thing, nor do you. Thanks for linking up to #brilliantblogposts x

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    1. Vicki thank you!! Your face and your personality go so well together, if you told me you were having any sort of surgery on your face (though I can't think on what) I'd be going "nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!" I loved Renee's old eyes, they were so cute... such a shame! But then if she's happy... who knows! x

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  32. I think accepting our flaws only comes as we get older. I've always hated my feet because I have bunions, but as I've gotten closer to 40, I now look at them differently. I still think the actual bunion isn't so nice but the feet themselves? Actually they're not so bad! I also had very crooked teeth up until I was about 30 when I could afford to have them done and I really am glad I did that. My smile changed overnight and so did my confidence.
    Suzy x
    www.suzyturner.com

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    1. I think it's great that there are "tweaks" we can make to make ourselves feel better and more confident, Suzy - getting teeth fixed is one of them!! Though I've talked about learning to love my "worst" feature, I think it's fine if people want to have work done. It's nice to have choice, after all...! Glad you feel that way about yourself! xx

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  33. I had my nose done after domestic violence. My daughter #3 has my nose and she looks very pretty. Strong eyebrows and strong defined nose. Very pretty. Of course she hates it. I often wonder what people would think if I had my original nose and now that I am 49 soon, my nose begins to look like it doesn't belong (to me anyway). Hindsight has 20/20 vision and its only later in life that we look back on it. The first 40 years our life is dominated by school and work and the comments of others. After 45 ish I note that comments and worries over looks mellow out and we all realise something.... not sure what, probably that the inevitable is ours after all and we begin to accept each other. When you're young comments from your parents are dismissed that one day it will be your turn. Once you see the signs appearing, there's no way out, so you begin to live in earnest, instead of in ignorance.

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    1. Wow that's tough, sweetie - but it sounds like you've come through it well and are a stronger person as a result. I hope your daughter gets to "mellow out" like you said you've done and accept herself too... It's silly that it takes most of us till we're much older to think this way, I hope things change. I guess it's what we pass on to the next generation, isn't it...?

      Thanks so much for your comment, much love to you xx

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  34. I am a "stronger featured" woman, namely a more pronounced nose. I was even called ugly and I am sure some people still think I am. But, I am unique...and others are intrigued and call me gorgeous, classic, pretty, cute. Surgery would likely ruin my face. All proportions would be off. Like if Angelica Huston got a button nose job, it wouldn't work at all.

    While there are times I wish I had that cute as a button female face, would I really be me, then?

    I think you are absolutely beautiful.

    And I want to be Morticia Addams for Halloween or cosplay.

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